During my first workshop about prioritizing what's most important, I shared a formula on making sure you're prioritizing things that energize and add value to you. 🤔
Near the end of the session, I got a question from one of the attendees:
"How do you prioritize what's most important with your partner? What happens when you have different priorities?"
Those are great questions!
Based on your own interests and responsibilities, you have a set of priorities that are unique to you. When your partner comes into the mix, they will have their own priorities unique to them as well. That's common and probably healthy.
I believe the best thing we can do is to respect & support each other's priorities and make compromises when we can. 🔑
Let's pretend that your partner has an arts & crafts hobby that you may not be interested in. Your partner may want to spend time on it every week or even every day. You, on the other hand, prioritize quality time with your partner and prefer not to spend your evenings doing anything else besides relaxing.
Your partner's hobby may be their version of self-care after a stressful workday. They value stimulating their creative side of the brain. It may be something that energizes them and lifts up their mood. That energy your partner gets back can positively affect your relationship through their undivided attention and engagement.
Sounds nice, huh? 👌
You value time-well-spent with your partner as your form of self-care. This sort of activity could be your way to separate your work life from home life. Sometimes, the only way to mentally transition off of work is to be present in the moment with the people around you and with your laptop closed.
In this specific scenario, your partner may want a scheduled dedicated time for their hobby without interruptions. After that dedicated time, you can have your quality time together.
If you both happen to have different interests, maybe dedicate uninterrupted time for both of your sets of interests.
If you want your partner to engage in your priorities, offer to help them with theirs in return.
Ultimately, if done right, respecting, supporting, and compromising for each other's priorities will energize and add value to you in the long-run. ✅
Communicate with Empathy and Perspective
I challenge you to approach the conversations with empathy and perspective. Allow your partner to understand WHY your priorities matter to you. And on the flip side, be sure to understand WHY their priorities matter to them.
This, obviously, can work for any other person that is important in your life: family, co-workers, friends, etc.
Prioritizing what's most important isn't a selfish act. Instead, it can be an act of love.
Have a chat with a loved one tonight and ask them this question:
How can I respect and support you with your priorities?